As I've already written before, there's little that infuriates me more than self-righteous, "progressive" men who call themselves feminists but continue to subtlety, piercingly, patronize women as though we're handicapped for simply being women. Eventually, this low-key sexism will be made clear because this breed of man will unknowingly slip and make a blatantly sexist remark, trying to dismiss it as a joke. Not too long ago, anincident of this sort happened,and naturally, it's got me questioning whether our societies, schools, communities are really as egalitarian as they claim to be.
Now, brushing cultural practices and norms aside, is it too soon for us to be making sexist jokes? We live in a world where "rape" is used metaphorically to describe mundane situations and rape victims have called us out on this multiple times- we're belittling the crime, making it seem unimportant and petty. I guess that it what jokes do: provide comic relief when things are getting too serious. It's a way of saying "hey! This isn't that big of a deal. It's actually funny if you think about it. Let's laugh at it." So have we really moved into an era where there's comedy to be recognized in sexism? How about slavery? Anti-Semitism? Xenophobia? The Holocaust? The KKK? Genocide? Virtually any form of oppression, for that matter? Have we really eradicated all oppression to the point that there's nothing left but to laugh about it?
What is especially problematic of 21st century sexism is that it's so deeply engrained into our minds, we don't recognize it. Yes, women can vote and do go school (in most places, at least) but women are not expected to get too involved in politics or excel too much in academics (especially the sciences) or they'll lose their sex-appeal and become freaks. There's a very clear dichotomy between what's written in our laws and what actually happens in reality. Women are supposed to obsess over make-up and their looks whilst men are considered "gay" or "fags" if they do so too. If a woman doesn't conform to these standards, she's an angsty, fugly shrew. Anyone else notice the allusions to Anybodys from West Side Story or Kat Stratford from 10 Things I Hate About You? Has anything truly changed in the last few decades?
While few will come right out and be explicitly sexist, have you noticed the spike in hyper-masculinity in recent years as some men are increasingly defying gender norms by wear make-up and feminine clothes? It's as though the other men are trying to salvage their manhood by being uber fuckboys, gym freaks, gang rapists for the "street cred." Because ultimately, even if no one will come right out and say it: there's nothing worse than being a girl. Think about it. What are common phrases to express confidence and bravery? "Strap on/grow a pair," "Have the balls to..." How about frailty and weakness? "Stop being a pussy." Quite frankly, the actual tragedy here is that people of all genders use these phrases, completely oblivious to the fact they are dripping of sexism.
There is little to look forward to if laws and legislature change to be more feminist (i.e. equal rights for all people regardless of their gender, not whatever ignorant misconception far too many people have of feminism) but our mentalities don't. Oppression, of all forms, is alive and breathing, folks. And there's little to laugh about when this very oppression is the reason people are being denied basic rights, an education, fair trials after they've been raped, confidence to pursue their dreams without constantly being told that they need to be careful not to become too successful, too threatening, or too unattractive or they'll risk scaring away potential spouses. Sesixm is not exclusively a Saudi Arabian issue nor is it a scar in our history we can blissfully rub over and crack jokes about; it is a wound we have refused to let heal. Cracking jokes about sexism or any type of oppression is distasteful, ignorant and offensive. Whether the victims of that form of oppression are in the room or not, you're still feeding into the inherent sexism of our societies.
This is not to say that comedy cannot be used to make a point about a social issue. Take Trevor Noah, for instance, pre-The Daily Show; he would use his brilliant wit to comment on racism and politics in South Africa. Nevertheless, recklessly constructed jokes mocking the oppression of many, is definitely not okay. It is pouring salt over seething wounds without even realizing how deep and infectious it is. It most certainly is too soon to be making sexist jokes, far too soon.
